How To Cook A Husband Recipe
Photo source: Grandmother's Kitchen
One of our Grandmother's found this hilarious special little recipe in an old autograph book from 1957. We hope you will enjoy and that it will be taken in good humor from the men.
The following recipe is not found in any of the elaborate works on cookery.
A good many husbands are spoiled by mismanagement.
Some women blow them up, others keep then constantly in hot water.
Others let them freeze by their carelessness and indifference.
Some keep them in a stew with irritating ways and words.
Others roast them and some keep them in a pickle all their lives.
It cannot be supposed that any husband will be tender and good managed this way, but, they are really delicious when properly treated.
In selecting your husband you should not be guided by the silvery appearance, as in buying mackerel nor by the golden shine if you wanted salmon.
Be sure to select him yourself as tastes differ.
Do not go to market for him as the best as always is when brought to your door.
It is better to have none unless you will patiently learn how to cook him.
A preserving kettle of the finest porcelain is best.
But; if you have nothing but an earthenware, pickling it will do. Spice can improve.
They are apt to fly out of the kettle and be burned and crusty on the edges, since like crabs and lobsters, you have to cook them while still alive.
Make a clean steady fire out of "LOVE" neatness and cheerfulness.
Set him as near this as seems to agree with him.
If he sputters and fizzes do not be anxious, some husbands do this until they are quite done.
Add a little sugar in the form of what confectioners' call kisses.
But, no vinegar or pepper on any account.
A little spice improves them, but it must be used with judgement.
Stir him gently, watching the while lest he is too flat and close to the kettle and so becomes useless.
You cannot fail to know when he is done.
If thus treated you will find him very digestible, agreeing with you and he will keep as long as you want, unless you become careless and set him into a cool place!